Crumbl Cereal (Chocolatey Chip Cookie)

Name: Crumbl Cereal (Chocolatey Chip Cookie)
Variation: n/a
Manufacturer: Kellogg's

Review: To preface, I've had a love/hate relationship with Crumbl Cookies ever since one opened up in my town last year. I love their cookies, but I hate the way the company profits from psychologically manipulating its customer base (with rotating flavors - spelled F-O-M-O) and hijacking their health (by marketing dangerous levels of butter and sugar via hyperpalatability). And then there are the claims of child labor exploitation. Personally, I'm not concerned about that - if a kid wants to work, let them work. It's what the law allows them to do that bothers me. It's a perfect example of how unregulated capitalism feeds the obesity epidemic. My ethical conscience is stronger than my sweet tooth (and I have a powerful sweet tooth), so I stopped eating their cookies. But I guess I can make an exception for this new cereal - as fast as the novelty cereal market is (and it's faster than I ever imagined it could be), I don't expect to see new flavors weekly, or even monthly. Maybe yearly, but we'll see.

Opening the box, the cereal emits an aroma suggestive of fried dough. Visually, it's reminiscent of Cookie Crisp, but with a very pale overall impression. The box promises not just chocolate chips, but "chocolatey" chips, yet these are practically specks. The picture of the cookie on the box only emphasizes how pitiful the cereal pieces look by comparison. They're crunchy, and soften up considerably in milk, recalling the soft center of a Crumbl cookie. But the flavor is pretty lacking. Without the unhealthy amounts of butter and sugar (the nutritive value of this cereal actually isn't so bad), there's not much to enjoy. It surely isn't any competition for Chips Ahoy. I'm gonna call this product a media cash-in. People are gonna buy it because the box is pink and says "crumbl". Well, I fell for it. Now you don't have to.

Rating: 🥣
Leftover Milk: Tastes like... fried dough?